Often times when we feel overwhelmed with change, our first instinct is to seek familiarity. For new college students, this can mean wanting to come home on the weekends, eat favorite home-cooked meals, and return to the comfort of an old familiar bedroom. Your child may even have feelings of sadness or anxiety, which are also very normal responses to change. So, what can you do, as loving parents, to help your child through the natural emotional bumps that come with separating from home?

Validate your child’s feelings. Let your child know that you understand and agree that it must be hard. While your first instinct may be to reassure her by telling her not to worry and everything will be okay, it is more helpful to let her know that you understand that this is a difficult time.

Be an active listener. Your child is likely experiencing a wide variety of feelings as she navigates this transitional time. One of the most important ways that we work through homesickness is to talk about our feelings. Do what you can to create a safe space so that your child can openly express her feelings. If your child does not want to share, that’s okay too. Just let her know that you are available if she wants to talk.

Let your child know that feelings of homesickness are normal. Your child may think that she is the only one who is feeling this way. Let her know that these feelings are quite normal and are a natural response to such significant changes. Remind her that even the kids down the hall who are laughing and seem to be doing great, probably have times when they feel homesick too.

Strike a healthy balance. While your inclination may be to talk to your child multiple times a day, or to text throughout the day, finding a balanced amount of communication is important so that your child has space to branch out and develop new relationships. Of course, your child should know that she can always call in times of distress, but setting up a weekly “phone-home night” allows for a sense of stability and consistency, and also sends the message that you have confidence in your child to build new friendships. You may also try other forms of communication (i.e. e-mails or snail mail, sending care packages, etc.)

Encourage your child to seek campus resources. Bellarmine’s campus is filled with opportunities for support. Get familiar with campus resources so that you can encourage your child to seek additional support during this transitional time. Such resources include RAs, Residence Hall Directors, Campus Ministry staff members, Academic Resource Center (ARC) staff members, and the Counseling Center staff members(502-452-8480), who provide free, confidential therapy services to Bellarmine students.